Comparisons can't compare.

I've always been really bad at comparing things. Even when I was looking for this laptop, I had difficulty. I'm not the kind of person that's interested in research or finding the best deal. I just look for what I want. If it has what I need and I trust it, that's what I go with. It's bad, but that's why I always ask my friend, Brandi, to research cat food for me. :P
The point of this is that I'm tired of being compared. I'm not as intelligent as the next person, or as hard-working, or as pretty, or as thin, or as big-chested, or as unique. But I've come to realize that it doesn't matter. Somewhere in the world, someone will always be better than me. Someone will have at least one thing that I don't or do at least one thing better, and I'm just going to have to understand that. Which I do... a little.
I've had a friend recently who has difficulty with the good things in my life. Yes, I have an apartment, two cats, an amazing boyfriend, and it looks like my life is great.
That's the snapshot. Here's the truth. I don't have a steady job. The job I have drives me insane because I'm unappreciated and overworked. I feel like I have no family. I know I do, but actions speak louder than words. My boyfriend's family actually tends to treat me better than my own. I'm struggling to pay the bills for said apartment and I'm going to have to beg for money soon, even though I've already applied to at least ten or fifteen places since moving here.
That's the truth. Here's the reality. The reality is that no one cares. No one knows how I raised myself through high school. No one knows I've never had family to turn to. No one knows that I found ways to motivate myself and get to where I am today. No one knows that it still hurts.
Have you ever had a scar? It's a funky piece of skin where your wounds have healed. My biggest scar still feels weird when I touch it. It tingles, like my body is remembering all of the pain that went into it before it healed. It hurts if you aren't careful with it. It's stretched from the sun and people don't always notice it. Some people don't notice for months or years. Even when you realize you don't have to hide it, you still bend your arm inward and wear long-sleeved shirts.
No one can tell you your life is any less important because they can't know unless they've been through it in your shoes. But don't push them away. Don't force people to take your side or be your enemy, because there are so many shades of gray.
Well, I'm exhausted. I had a moment of weakness and saw my life through the wrong end of the telescope, and I forgot what it means to be happy. And I am. But every now and then we get the chance to look back and be sad to remind ourselves what it means to be strong. So be strong for me.